Monday, May 08, 2006

Odds and Ends - Some random thoughts

1. Tim Russert needs all the help he can get these days. Little Russ looks like a Kennedy cousin; one of those jolly miscreants cleared of criminal charges through the intercession of powerful friends, a man who took a pledge to annoy the innocent and grovel before the guilty on "Meet the Press." He can grill a Nancy Pelosi as if she was Eva Braun, while pussy footing with some Republican blowhard Senator. Speaking of Ms. Pelosi - I'm sure she's a nice woman - she has to be because she is so ineffective - which is often the property of niceness. Someone should tell the Democrats that being politic is no longer good politics. Where did they ever learn that statesmanship is being bland and boring? We need more Churchill and less Church Lady these days. There must be a school for losers that Democrats attend where they learn to hone and polish their concession speeches. Passion is good politics.

2. What do we have to do to get Tom Cruise out of the news and the news back into the news? Is there no rich emerite willing to offer him safe refuge like Dubai was for Michael Jackson? I would gladly let them run our ports in exchange for getting him safely out of this country and his films out of the cineplex. The world is simply too serious for this kind of foolish, self indulgent circus master - another demented, hard smiling egomaniac with a Mission Impossible - appearing human.

3. And what shall we do about poor Laura Bush? Is there no organization for the protection of former librarians married to pathological liars? However did a good girl like Laura ever get mixed up with that rough Bush crowd? Was it all a musical like "Grease" or a melodrama like "Reefer Madness?" Or are we all decieved? Could she be the Lady Macbush behind this bloody throne? What is it about Texas that can create a Laura Bush (America's favorite white gloved gun-moll) and her polar opposite, a plain spoken, truth telling Ann Richards. Now there's a great lady who deserves everyone's good wishes these days.

4. What can we make of David Brooks, The New York Times house conservative? Like a house wine he is acceptably bland, moderately priced, and he doesn't spoil the meal but he hardly adds any zest to it. He now bemoans the mean spiritedness of the Democrats as their fortunes appear to rise. Where was his voice of moderation and reason when Limbaugh and Coulter (those daffy, darling, defamers) were throwing their poisend brickbats and mud-pies at the (dare I say it)Li-li-li-liberal Democrats?

5. And will somebody tell our Katie to do something about that multi-million dollar grin before reading the evening news on CBS? Practise your frown. Botox be damned. We don't need perky these days, we need Ed Murrow and all his furrows to get us through the next thousand days of Bush & Co. - tragic days for this country.